WHIRLWIND TRIPS.......HOME, SWEET HOME

Whew.......not really sure where to begin.....since I last blogged, I have been to Chicago, St. Louis and Costa Rica......I'll start with Chicago.....what can I say? My sister, Peggy, joined Gary and I in Chicago, and while Gary had meetings, Peggy lead me on a speed walk of shopping non-stop.....including downtown Chicago and Highland Park (very sheshe(sp?) children's clothes.....sidewalk sales and Peggy's beautiful grandchild, Sabrina Reese.....what a doll....I hadn't had the opportunity to see her in person since last September, so it was wonderful to share this experience with Peggy......many purchases later, we all flew back to St. Louis to meet Jerry and spend Mother's Day weekend....Gary got to see his mom at the nursing home......so sad....she has so much inner strength in her.....I am a basket case just spending a few hours there.....a true reflection on how some people live out their older years......we all went to the cemetery on Sunday and had some good conversations with my mom.....if ever there was a present that she would have loved, it would be Peggy and I rebonding in a more special way than ever........we told my father to make sure he was taking good care of her and that they were in our thoughts always......a good cathartic cry was had by all.........their lives shall live on through our good thoughts and deeds......good thoughts to live by....went to an art show while we were there.....the four of us had a wonderful time......Gary went back to Chicago and I flew back to Birmingham for two days to repack my bags and head to Atlanta where Corey and I flew to Costa Rica for six of the quickest days I have ever spent.......first and most importantly, Liana and Maya are gorgeous and getting way too big and also very independent.......Still both four months short of being three years old, I get very melancholy when I watch them.......where has the time gone? If I could, I would freeze time NOW...........Maya speaks a lot of Spanglish and Liana, a little less, but Scott is really emphasizing his English to her.........I feel a little distant this time......many people in from out of town.....had to share my girls with a lot of people......so I was very reflective and just took in everything that I could.....Liana with her floaties swimming with Scott and learning to put her face under the water, and Maya......swimming like a shark (to quote her)......both very prissy.......Liana.....very girly......Maya, a combo of prissy and tomboy! Watching Maya grab hold of Liana's hand and insisting that they play.... I am so lucky....didn't bring a camera down and I am in big trouble with some people back in Birmingham....but I will be going back soon, camera in hand.......same sense of heaviness as Corey and I got on the plane....of wishing for more.....but trying to embrace what I have.......,my sons are so happy...their wives are beautiful (one is very, very pregnant), and to watch my "boys" with their daughters is truly inexplicable joy......
I am back home now......with two and a half weeks of "nothing".....which I am excited about......EMBRACE THE MOMENT, ABBY......YOU ARE ONE LUCKY WOMAN!

I WILL FACE THIS DAY WITH COURAGE.....

Today is the day that I must pack suitcase number l....
I have checked the weather forecast in Chicago and it is going to be warm.....Aaargh......that totally ruins my plans for what I was going to take.....after going and exercising this morning to get my endorphins going, I am running to Babies'rUs to get a last minute "must need" for the new baby, I am coming home......oh no........I have to also stop at Rite-Aid and Target to stock an extra "vanity bag".......and then my packing will start......Target ending time and locking of suitcase will be by 2:00 this afternoon....earlier if possible......I continue to be focused on my Costa Rica trip next week.....one day at a time, Abby......live life in the moment.......stay posted to see if my goal is reached.....I would love some "down time this afternoon" to get relaxed and rested before the big night.....AMERICAN IDOL..... I will face this day with courage, but a few good lucks from my family and friends couldn't hurt......

THE SUITCASES ARE FIGHTING BACK.....

Well, it's Monday afternoon at 5:30 and according to my blog posting of a few days ago titled "Fear the of the Suitcase", I should have already been packed by now.....but alas, I did not reach my goal......I have taken out a couple suitcases.....I have packed the stuff that I am bringing for Maya, Liana, Gisella and Ana and for the new baby.........I have started to make a pile for myself....constantly saying "it's only six days"......but I am leaving the day after tomorrow for Chicago and St. Louis and I am going into my panic mode....(I know you probably think that I am overreacting.....but trust me, I know the signs.....I went on a two hour spree this afternoon returning hundreds of dollars of purchases from yesterday......AND I DID FEEL GOOD ABOUT GETTING THIS DONE BEFORE I LEFT TOWN. Nontheless, my Wednesday through Sunday suitcase is empty....in fact, it's not even out!!!!) I also finally went to the framing store today to get Gisella and Scott's picture as well as Gisella and Monica's (her sister)....they are both pregnant, due within days of each other and they took some beautiful pictures together......Of course I have had these pictures for four weeks, but waited until THE LAST MINUTE to get this done....I had to pay extra to insure that the framing material would arrive at the framers in time for them to do the work, but regardless, I am due to pick them up next Monday afternoon.....NO MORE PROCRASTINATION.......(THAT WILL BE DISCUSSED ANOTHER DAY......)
Anyway, back to the revenge of the suitcases.......I think I have a plan mapped out....I am not pulling anything out until tomorrow morning so that I can see what the Chicago temperature is........I was planning on long sleeve, but I think the weather is not going to cooperate with that plan, so for now, I shall take a deep breath, take a hot bath, and know that tomorrow will be the day of the closing of the dreaded suitcase.....I shall prevail!!!!!!

IT'S TIME FOR THE SUNDAY PAPER

I truly love Sunday mornings.....they are the extension of the early morning rituals that Gary and I have established.....coffee in bed.....listening to CNN News, and best of all, that big, delicious Sunday paper.....(Don't think I have totally lost my mind.....I know it's the "Birmingham" paper, and not the New York Times)......but it's a lot of reading for me......everyone has their own style of newspaper reading, and I am no different.....I love when I go see my attorney/litigator daughter, Corey, in Atlanta....she has littler joy over her paper....it's straight to the funnies...and then she pretty much tosses the rest....
I dig in to find the crossword puzzle, fluff and puff my pillows, coffee on the nightstand, and attack the puzzle with fervor hoping it will be one of those Sundays where I can face the challenge and start my day off right.....for those of you who never do the puzzle, Sunday's is generally the hardest of the week......once I have done as much as I can...I jump to the Lifestyle section so I can see if there is anybody I know who has managed to get their picture in the paper....(usually, that is a NO).......the front page and the reality of the world comes next and then one of my favorite sections....looking at the real estate section and seeing if there is a new house I would like to buy....(no, I am not moving.......it's just part of the Sunday routine......and you never know......) I love the local news section....it makes me realize where I am (I know it's Birmingham).....but I do enjoy the local flavor and it reminds me why Gary and I moved back to Birmingham after several attempts to go elsewhere.....I quickly scan the sports page, the commentary, and of course all of the sale circulars that come out knowing I will find something that I HAVE TO HAVE.......(generally Gary starts frowning at this time), and then I must confess I go to the obituary section.....Ever since I lost my parents, this has become a ritual.....seeing who has gone this week.....hoping I don't see any name that I know...but if that is the case, jotting it down so I am reminded to acknowledge the loss to the family....send a card or a contribution......that was so important to me and take such little effort.....
I am generally on my second cup of coffee by then and making another attempt at the crossword, seeing if my mind can fill in a few more blanks.
Sundays also conjure up thoughts of families together......maybe I can pick up my two granddaughters and take them out for a bagel......go to the Tot Lot....take them to the zoo, or just love on them........reality then sets in.....they are in Costa Rica.......I am melancholy....but it seems just as if my children can sense the way I am feeling, I get calls on the phone from all of them......and life is good......
THE SUNDAY PAPER, THAT EXTRA CUP OF COFFEE AND CALLS FROM MY CHILDREN.........THIS IS GOING TO BE A GOOD DAY......

SIMPLE PLEASURES ARE.........

In my new journey to live life more "in the moment"....more purposely, more "stop and smell the roses" mode, I have made some lovely observations.....for me, the "larger than life" parts of your life are incredible, but they are far and few between.....those "big" moments.......events that are planned for months are gone in a few hours.....and sometimes the preparation exceeds the actual event....for me the "preparation" is exhausting....I am like a race horse ......but at least he stays on the track running in circles.....I create my own circles of frenetic planning, unnecessary buying, attempts to create the most wonderful atmosphere....that I exhaust myself before the "moment" and therefore, taking away from the special event........I run my own race, but I go way "off course"........I certainly don't get the "wreath of roses" thrown over my body.....anxiety overcomes me.....some reward,don't you think????????
As I attempt to "make some small changes" I am truly seeing that it is the simple pleasures which fill me the most.....which make me smile........life doesn't have to be about the "special occasions".......it is my recognition of what goes on in my daily life that put smiles on my face...that warm my heart.......when I am at the gym and I am able to give someone a little assistance....it is their hug and true sense of appreciation that gives me "my perk".....it is those great workouts with Martha, my training partner, at the gym, who I am developing a wonderful relationship with......that make me realize how wonderful it is to be able to be healthy enough to push this body of mine to greater heights...to feel those endorphins kicking in and thinking I can conquer the world (after I take a nap and four advil, of course)........
It is about my daily existence with Laurie, my bestest friend, who I share everything with.....our conversations can range from deep and emotional to even more importantly, the results of last night's reality show.....it is our inhibited freedom to express our joy about "whatever".....there is such a difference between being a little crazy on all your own - and being a little crazy together....I have a big grin on my face as I write of our relationship.....she's a keeper.......
It is watching Gary cook for some friends last night....a last minute invitation which has me scurrying to Whole Foods (an experience which always brings on "anxiety attacks...) to get all the ingredients he needs to prepare his special dinner.....his joy in slicing, dicing, experimenting with sauces, glazes, presentation (although not important to me at all)....his face says it all...he is joyous...it is that simple.....as our guests rave at his creations, his face lights up.......
It is my visits to Atlanta to see Corey, my beautiful lawyer, who I watch in amazement as her confidence grows, as she takes baby steps to get into her "happy place".......it is her telephone conversations to me.....some good...some not so good......but I am trying to learn to relish all of them....life is not all about the good.......it's that they are "shared experiences".....it is hearing her joy when she gets her income tax refund in the mail!
You see, what I have come to discover is that the simple pleasures are my greatest treasures......

MY GLASS IS ALWAYS HALF FULL...

As the old adage goes, your glass is either half full or half empty.....we all know negative people whose glass is not only half empty.......it's totally empty.....nothing seems to be quite good enough.....they always look at the negative side of any situation......it's so emotionally draining to spend time with people who find no joy in life.....I have no patience for it......L
As I grow older, I find it increasingly more important to spend my time with people who "fill their own glasses"......they bring joy to their lives and to that of others.........they help us to fill our glasses if we are going through a struggle.....they revel in our joys and successes........
I have two gorgeous granddaughters one another on the way soon who live in Costa Rica......I am constantly asked.....oh, my goodness....how do you handle that? They are so far away....It must be devastating for you.....My answer to them is simple....I revel in the relationship with my two "beauties" and the unlimited access that my sons and daughters-in-law have granted Gary and I......I realize this is not always the case......especially since I am the mother of two sons......I am so grateful for what I have....for what they give to Gary, Aunt Corey and myself......my children are indeed a blessing........their relationships with one another continue to astound me......their consideration, generosity and outward signs of love are a continuous source of love and joy for me......I know my glass is full..........and for those of you who tend to consider your glass to be half empty, count your blessings and fill that cup up.........

'FEAR OF THE SUITCASE"

Other than a few trips to see my daughter in Atlanta, where I can literally throw a few things into the car.......it has been TWO MONTHS AND TWO DAYS since I have had to have a confrontation with a suitcase, and more specifically, what it represents........I must confess I have a severe issue with WHAT AND HOW TO PACK......WHAT SHOULD STAY HOME AND WHAT SHOULD GO?????? Why do I also decide that two pairs of shoes is not enough? Why do I break out the jewelry bag and see what to tote with me when I ALWAYS WEAR THE SAME NECKLACE. Why do I feel the need to pack clothes in case we go out somewhere nice......when for the last eight years that I have travelled to Costa Rica to visit my sons, eventually my daughters-in-law, and joyfully my two and three-fourths gorgeous granddaughters, Maya Taylor, Liana Rosalina and a new baby girl due in July.......My passport affirms that I have made over 40 trips to Costa Rica in the last eight years and my packing dilemna...thats putting it lightly....it is always frustrating.....sometimes paralyzing....and until I zip my bags the morning of the trip,I am ALWAYS adding something else to the suitcase......Let me give you a little more insight into my trips there.......although they are always joyous and since the girls arrived, exhausting, I always wear the same things....lightweight capris and a t-shirt....I sometimes bring jeans.....but if I am in Quepos which is where Scott, Gisella and Liana live.....a beautiful beach town.....there are three temperatures....hot, hotter and intolerable.....Scott's house is air-conditioned......but the rule is..the fewer clothes, the better!!!!!!!! We might go out to eat once or twice, but cool and casual are always the rule....hence my cute little summer sweaters serve no purpose there.....but then also spend half my time in San Jose with Todd, Ana and Maya....where the temperature is a little more moderate......once in a blue moon, you might need a light jacket in the early morning or evening....let's make sure you understand and more importantly, I understand....one light blazer would do the trick......but should it be khaki, black or denim????? AAAARGH.......
Next we come to vanity....although I am the first to admit that I am a "high maintenance" girl and not ashamed to tell you.....why do I think I am going to need to bring a microdermabrasion kit with me or a facial renewing masque....toner, eye cream, anything other than the basics???????????
I must add that usually my Costa Rica trips involve bringing a slew of products to the kids, along with my normal stash of clothes and toys for my two beauties.....Abby always comes through....and it is one of the true joys of my life....but once again, I sometimes don't use moderation.....I have had run-ins with the Customs Officials for bringing in anything from Golden Rule bar-b-que to plumbing parts for Todd's house he is building....they ask for it.....I bring it.....I have been put on "embargo" twice....that's when the customs officials declare you have brought too much into the country and they RED STAMP your passport and you are put on restrictions on what you bring in for six months.....they smile when they see me coming.......
Once I have packed, there is the further anticipation if my bags will meet the weight limits......and I know you will not be surprised to know...they rarely do.....so I always have to bring a spare folding suitcase so that no bag weighs over 60 pounds......I always have to pay for extra luggage, but that's just a given...
My impending trip to my "babies" is compounded by the fact that next Wednesday, I am going to St. Louis and Chicago next Wednesday - Sunday.....and I leave for Costa Rica on Tuesday......
THIS CALLS FOR SOME SEVERE PLANNING......I AM DOING MY OWN INTERVENTION......MY SUITCASES FOR THE FIRST TRIP WILL BE PACKED ON SATURDAY.....AND MY BAGS FOR COSTA RICA WILL BE PACKED ON SUNDAY........I will only have to transfer my "vanity bag" which I am putting a restrictions limit on........and it will NEVER BE UNPACKED......
There will be no "extra" clothes packed, no what-ifs, no shoe store in the suitcase.....I am going to take charge....I can do this....I know I can.....well, let's rephrase this....I am going to do my best to take this "beast" and conquer it......no promises.....just hope that this stress-reducing routine of my life can be put into its proper perspective.......when I go to Costa Rica, it's Abby that
everybody is wanting to see....not her clothes.......I am a lucky lady.......Wish me luck!